2011 JUNE PUERTO VALLARTA
Waiting for the plane and watching a tiny boy, wobbly on his feet, throwing a bottle cap which he delightedly retrieves like a puppy. We are probably the only gringos in the whole airport. Good decision to have hired an exclusive car ( actually a van). Our Brit driver arrives 15 mins early (6:15 am) cheerfully drives us through Otay Mesa--no inspection of bags--we're through in seconds. 1/2 hour door to airport. An hour later we are here waiting for the plane--all in all a little less confusing than last time. I take that back-- they keep changing gates and we were waiting for plane to Guanajito or something and rush upstairs to the gate we were originally directed to--"hurry, the plane is boarding." Very Not. Attendant jabbering at us in Spanish--unwarranted unease. I guess that describes the experience.
Plane less than 1/2 full so our A and B seats can be A and C (aisle and window-- no middle seat-- remember for next time).
Last minutes the plane fills up and fat person takes Bob's seat. One flight a day leaving only a couple of times a week and that's what you get.
Aloft, the steward speaks in Spanish for ten minutes, there is applause-- and for less than one minute in English he explains it's someone's birthday, weather is fine in PV and enjoy your trip. B thinks the native speech must have been some sort of "travelogue".
I keep thinking while the Mexicans are being nice to us that these people love their children and that all these adults were children once so being unconditionally cooed over makes them "nice". -I know foolishly romantic-- I had the same perception about the Italians.
On our descent looking out the window I see the hills and farmland squares of greater PV, now a grove in one which reminds me of the VILLA and. The 100 date palm trees--flying over that memory even here- how much changed has it made me forever? We have landed to the loudspeakers drone of Spanish and the plane's passengers applaud and laugh - festive.
En route to our condo, passing derilect buildings and shops, our driver says "Very tacky downtown" and I think something about sailors, queers (maracon?) no it's malecon--he means tacky along the malecon - the shore walkway. It is.
After taking in our new home-away--quite nice even lovely indeed-high ceilings, great view of bay, comfortable, best buy of the century at $300 a week, our desultary walk ends at the supermarcado (but that was Italy) where we spend too much for provisions--$20 for some emantaler cheese--good god--tip the boy who loads the cab back home with our groceries and we're in--vodka tonics and wine carafes--for the night. Well almost--din din next.
At Saul's (known to others as Cafe Bohemio--Saul being a major personality-Danny's show biz acquaintance--great split pea soup--light, flavored very nicely but still essence of pea--have been here often-comparatively cheap--outdoor restaurant-- friendly even without in summer Saul's outrageous hostess presence--food has been frankly so-so but not I suppose the point. 1/2 price Margueritas. tasty.
Tho there's bread B "moderately unappetizing" I'm in 4 the light chips and semi spicy salsa. B's chile rellenos is " quite good" R despite the plethora oF marguerites enjoys the unexceptional special of chicken parmigiana--remembering that dish at Fedoras in the NYC village that always made him sick . Ah but the ambiance there. B enjoys his
Back to really appreciate the splendor of sunset on the bay from our balcony --our bargain condo is really . . . well nice, sooo Mehican --the inevitable plaster and ceramic artifacts in profusion , quiet bedroom from which i write this recollectively in the middle of the night, catching up, must describe our anchor for the next 2 weeks--comfortable, drawing you to the palapa and ocean vista beyond--and to discover how to operate our 2 tv's w all-American channels hooray.
6/10
Good sleeping in the quiet and on the comfortable bed.
Disparate, desperate efforts to separate us from our money as we walk along the malecon. Actually discovered the Cafe Des Artisers in the area of art galaries--where we celebrated expansively and expensively Bob's 70th along with Danny and Brian 2 1/2 years ago. Photos are available to prove it. Now there's a holstered guard in front so I dare not take a photo. We had our
"Plastic plates?" "No! Classy place. " Yes. Bob not certain which I said. We're getting old/er.
Now here in Oscar's beside the river and the gila monsters climbing the river edge trees; it's the same as other times we visited. Bob enjoys his club sandwich and I, still celebrating the locale, a fajita, but the point is the upscale-- for PV - atmosphere and the lovely 2 for one frozen Margieritas, of which we each have 3--sufficient for a pleasant mid-afternoon nap. I can feel the warm growing flesh around my waist--a sly monster invading this once fit and comparatively slim senior, directing him to soft chairs and couches and cloudy colored glasses of booze for a fortnight of epicurean profligacy south of his border.
Just read that to Bob who is decidedly more relaxed now . Nevertheless he says, "you-- meaning me and my prose -- get more overheated across the border". Well it is pretty hot here. Despite that I jumped 2000 on the condo building lower terrace--my underwear and shorts dripping wet. Bob delighted that he can receive and Send email from his Nook. Cocktails and then I make reservations for our June 17 anniversary next week at Vista Grill the restaurant near out first rented condo here on the hill.
Casual evening--drinks (R has discovered vodka tonics this trip--perfect antidote for the heat on the terrace--the condo is well air conditioned--we watch Advise and Consent in bed but refrain from the next Turner Classic, the Dirk Bogarde movie --Suspicion - about you know what--enough tortured homosexuals for one night.
June 11--Saturday
Finish Jennifer Egan's A Visit From The Good Squad just before any respectable person should be up but I'm not .. . respectable. Don't respect normal hours especially here in languorous PV.
"everybody loves the sunshine" blares yet not unpleasantly from the speakers at "green chairs" beach, our preferred gay beach--and R is enjoying the sunshine on his sun facing beachchair, B nicely ensconced under our shady palapa and reading a Janet Evanovich novel. I've already had a few drinks and club sandwich (ditto B) and a few swims in the warm and lovely ocean. Just downloaded Nancy Mitford's Love In A Cold Climate but for now it's that sun on my bod. And thus we lie here in the sand, Not contributing at all to society but decidedly " Being" to our own satisfaction.
Again in shade to submit with desultory "no gracias" to the terrifying variety of goods being purveyed, jeweled beer openers, lucha libre wrestling masks, massage with "happy ending”--recognize him from past years, flying--our young neighbor takes that offer up for $40, clings to the straps of the half balloon and rises and falls over the bay-- returns alive--tempted but for my famous fear of heights when in medias re. To questioning, B insists he's not bored just doesn't want too much sun--though he's swathed in shade.
Reuel jumps "only" 1500 on the condo bldg decks succumbing to the heat but nap and.shower awaits before treading out to our favorite ( and probably only) piano bar in PV, Garbo's, where co-owner German tells us much, eg, many San Diegans (gay we're talking) visit PV n even more Palm Springians, weather changing - last winter so cold heatless PVians in trouble. We already on 2nd martini's by the time the expats arriving, and we certainly not prepared to wait for the 10:30 "after dinner" piano and the 250 peso ($12 a drink) tab suggests we'll likely limit our visits and consumption at Garbo's in future. We wait for a quite good pizza at a nearby restaurant with all the trimmings to bear to our burrow, Reuel nodding to sleep before the melodramatic Michelle Pfeiffer movie on the cable has reached it's inconsequential denouement.
6/12 Sunday
I hear Bob pouring water to heat in the kettle and when I arise shortly thereafter see him out on the balcony watching the sea--not the "wine dark sea" which I wondered aloud about yesterday since it's blue--or was the ocean ever red around the Greek isles--or was wine ever blue--or is that how it's perceived at or beyond sunset? Vexing speculation.
After a Sunday morning spate of newsy shows, Candy, Fareed and Howie -- all somewhat distracted by the sorry Congressman Wiener spectacle, we freshen up for beach brunch buffet at that posh Mexican Hotel's restaurant--something - Los Arcos - comforting about eating Mex food with nationals and revisiting restaurants we know to be good enough. More walking north and after some odds and ends shopping at a little market around the corner, escape to the cool of our condo.
Today's Q to ponder: If
Bob has had two Margueritas to my 1/2 - virtue of staying dry. "senior u like massage? "Not today." "Tommorow? Tonigh? You like appointment. " I guess a simple no grasias works better than sounding indecisive.
The Last 1/2 swim before we leave at 4:30 encounters serious waves, that sexy couple kissing in the surf, goggled me having lovely porpoise time. Then refreshing shower at home and vodka tonic after 1500 rope jump while looking out at the bay. Sounds like R having deelightful time as he writes this diary next to the plant-filled view balcony unfettered by his silk (?) cocktail hour kimono. Yea!
Continuing the cocooning - I'm exhausted/relaxed from all the wave fighting and jumping and sun anyway - we gussy up the so-so sandwiches (not the partridge and eel concoctions we find in the
6/14 Tuesday
morning walk through the winding uneven streets of old town. Reuel buys a skimpy b suit for $20 and is a happy fellow.
Server is now pouring my light Modello (B is drinking
We don't arrive on the beach until just before 5 pm- not the plan, such as there is one - because bizzness lays it's big intrusive hand on us. In particular there are many attempts to call payroll with the wine lover staff hours - finally figured it out. Then receiving, approving, signing and faxing the escrow instructions for the sale of our wine bar to our current manager -- um, concierge/sommelier as he prefers - and his mama Geneva (love that name) who holds, thank Zeus, the pursestrings.
Anyway just one Margueritas -- our greenchairs server Oswaldo attending- and opportunity to swim like porpoise in the bay as the somewhat gray sky protects us from bad boy heat. Though noone cares, R models his new black bathing suit with élan. A mature man with vestiges of a swimmers body thinking he's a young person , believing, until the shock of a reflection somewhere.
6/15 Wed
I note that Mexicans stare death in the face -- literally. -- as evident in the store windows as we stroll along the malecon, the plethora of skeletal figurines and puppets, death visages abound in this beautiful, happy place. We are taking what has become our morning perambulation, starting after desultory A.M. around 9:30-10 when Lola appears to tidy up our digs. Also, as Bob reminds, it is pretty much his only exercise, not so
for the swimming and jumping other oldster. But the walks are fun - perhaps not much of a real glimpse into Mexican life, and plenty of "Hey guys" from the assorted vendors, with their narratives to our fronts and receding backs - a people that takes rejection with equanimity. Includes an excursion along the cuale ( river) one of our favorite walks - those wonderful rickity walking bridges swaying and clattering under tentative foot - ah Le Bistro, our target for lunch is still not open- probably will not ever be during our tenure here. We manage to tour the Mexican history museum. Thence to Daiquiry Dick' s - always reliable - our roly poly friendly waiter recommends the pesto chicken sandwich, which Bob clearly will have, chicken lover and pesto lover that he is, R the club - both very fine. R's 2 martinis (140 p not bad) and B's 2 chardonnays hit the spot. We are almost only patrons (seems like a theme here in Tourist destitute PV but still manage our favorite conversational game "speculation" in this case about the only other table: Who is the wife of that man, are they sisters, and whose children, is he a dentist who minored in college Spanish (he orders in Mexican) etc. That's what we do in case dear reader you were wondering what we talk about. We're speculators and fabulists.
Ah lovely air conditioning - Nap time? And then sleeping tourist beauty awakes (reminds me of the history pole in the to-be-constructed new malecon walk detailing the different eras of PV Mexican history, the pre-and post Columbian. Agricultural, mining era, and since the 60's the "Touristic Era" - wry self-awareness. But that the locals embrace it is, despite all, endearing and ineluctably inviting. Mitford finished, download the Sinatra bio - love free library lending program - and off to the beach late afternoon- Familiar beach server Oswaldo greets us as old friends he is ready to serve drinks. Swim, home, jump, B to the very mini market for provisions - snacky meal - MSNBC - and happy to bed.
6/16
We had no real lunch destination as happy ending (for our morning stroll that is)- after too much news of A. Wiener's resignation - this time uphill around the "gringo gulch", 1st to explore some of the byways including Hotel Amaca. Which apparently offers demure panorama sunsets as antidote to oppressive Blue Chairs gay hotel sunset offerings. Add gyrating Mex-strippers.
Walking By the famous PV church we hear a halting-rendition of Ave Maria on the bells - very funny - and then a series of gongs - sounds of schoolchildren in the next door school laughing and chanting. One can imbibe atmosphere thru any (and all) of the senses - I came, I saw, . . . I heard . . . In this instance. At cuale buy at artisan's stall earings and bracelet for Dorothy - her b'day coming up. He's sweet young man who strings the beads himself.
Memorable experience at Gaby's where Bob, reviews in mind, has led us. As usual owners and staff Greet us effusively as their only patrons. Hey it's summer; sensible people stay away ( but ha ha we know better -- seriously , we do.) Staff is Saul- who we later discover spent 7 years as a waiter in
Strolling back for our afternoon siesta after provisioning at the supermarket - which hardly super has semi bare shelves - we walk along the cuale bazaar as usual and a boy vendor excitedly points us to a nearby tree "iguana in the tree". There is. I duly photo it. He says "remember my cart. Buy something you don't need." he's not laughing. Bob confesses that he's enjoying this PV excursion more than the others - tho we enjoy company of B and D, this is nicer - more space - to be on our own.
Much siesta - nap - after that liquor Concoction one had at Gaby's. Then late to the beach to confront tsunami-style waves - only once this time in my new green short short bathing trunks - a 2nd time would be very scary. Home is cheese and crackers w cocktails - some cheeseburgers microwaved and chips - were paradise enow? Sunset really neat.
6/17 Friday.
It's the 3rd anniversary of our wedding. Time sure flyeth. Hugs and for breakfast sticky buns (1st of the day's indulgences).
Wandering the streets as is our wont. Bob declares he's discovering the charm of PV for 1st time of our visits here. Guess we didn't do byways before. Stop by the cuale artisan vendor who threads beads to buy Beth earings, having discovered his stand yesterday for Dorothy's gift. Pass one vendor who yells "hey big spenders". Not.
After stocking up on liquid provisions at our favorite liquor store, we decide to try our downstairs neighbor - on whose courtyard and palapa rooftops our balcony looks -- the Eldorado Restaurant. It's clearly been newly renovated. I have bloody mary's and Bob chardonnays (note obligatory plural). Bob hamburger, R crab sandwich.
At beach - frozen Margueritas hit the spot and I spend more time in the ocean, the waves being less obstreperous than yesterday's - young vendor passing by, "rosAry for you Monsieur? One for your boyfriend?"
Jump. Shower. A new man ready for the anniversary dinner at Vista Grill . 400 ps taxi up there. Ah the fabulous view. Flamenco guitar. Carefully trained attentive servers . And after 2 martinis apiece. What the hell. The 3 course tasting with wine accompaniment. Pinot grigio w the great - brilliantly spiced - asparagus soup containing an island of custard. OMG. R's pork tenderloin and b's ham roulades
are fabulous, wonderfully complex imaginative combination of ingredients perfectly accompanied by a tangy Cabernet.
Ok this is too perfect - a brûlée that is Heavenly! to die w a sorbet - subtle mango? - accompanied by a late harvest dessert wine. Yay.
You come to PV and miss this, you're a fool (we get away w c. $125 for all that).
The sun has set and the bay is a deep blue surrounded by twinkling lights. Happy Anniversary.
Bob asks for la quenta and server Caesar
Says.with a few glasses of wine your Spanish is Improving. Wags all.
Even the taxi driver back home - "Another week? That's for tequila shots." (we'll do our best.) and back home in time for fireworks on the bay. Nifty.
Almost 10 pm and I'm ready to retire now to the fascinating Sinatra bio and memories of another - very special -day in paradise.
6/18
Bob is constrained to note that don't let anyone say we don't work hard for our pleasure. I opine that I'd kill them if they did . This as we trudge along the highway we used to trudge along when we lived way up on the hill 2 years ago. We have apparently headed in the wrong direction in the mid- day sun as the traffic whizzed by until my - I love you iPhone - gps in "open table" for Tastes restaurant the gay hotel in the hills clearly indicates where we are not and then are going. Prior to that we'd had a nifty walk along the ridge above the sea - a kind of la Lolla-style enclave - - even found a compound where Nixon stayed in 1970 - no doubt in his suit and Wing tips.
Find it pant pant Tastes in the gay hotel in a paradisal setting - we are the only luncheon customers - what's going on? - hotel residents having breakfast - we're early - but an hour later we are only ones period - jolly plump Pancho attending to our needs. Me, martini, b chard as we await our starter course. Which is enough for a meal. R taking doggie bag on quesadilla w mushrooms - lovely. B's gazpacho excellent w a faint spiceiness that says hey we're in
And then at least down the hill to nap after nip.
Water lovely for swimming but afterward a brief revenge by Montezuma cuts short R's jumping routine (clearly not the antidote) but Imodium succeeds to the rescue sufficiently for consuming cheese, that doggy ton of quesadilla, vodka tonic and Twentieth Century with John Barrymore and Carole Lombard wonderfully overacting.
6/18 Sunday
Catching some of the Sunday programs - secretary gates making one wonder why we're really at war - taking our time - no maid today to scurry away for.
seeking a proper Sunday brunch on this Father's Day, we discover that one our favorites, The
River Cafe, (neighboring beautiful Oscar's is empty) has a terrific buffet plus mimosa for $150 pesos - the gay mgr greets us like long-lost cousins and gives us the last riverside seating (rare sight - a busy restaurant) - only one other gay table - many Mexican families - I guess there are a few wealthy nationals to be found in PV - they're not all beach and street vendors slinging bags of trinkets and suspect fruit on skewers.
Beach/frozen margaritas/swim and after cleaning and prettying up we head uphill and those many steps for the Amaca Hotel sunset happy hour only to be discouraged by ominous clouds and a few drops - back down the steps to Garbo's and German, pronounced with "H", the owner's, ministrations (this time happy hour - not premium - martinis, thank you very much). 1st on, even. Before his expat customer who lives conveniently above the bar.
Waiting for take home pizza from la pizza nostra, alongside table of gringo fathers and their teenage sons. We talk on the short walk back home about favorite restaurants in PV and elide to subject of Saul's Cafe Bohemio. Bob jokes that we should stake Danny to open a restaurant.
I joke that we could call it
Danny's Cafe Bulemia - "You don't want to eat the food". Unkind.
Pizza and wine perfect at home. No loud music from restaurant below as there was fri and sat this week. That's a relief- this condo is still a fine candidate for re-renting next year.
6/20 Monday
Feeling sense of fulfillment. Tosses/turned early am realizing I had not sent beth my jordy grad letter and sending something on behalf of both of us after our morning walk which included a visit to the Liz and Dick house tho it dares not admit it up on the hill on gringo town. It's Monday and there's a general lethargy abounding that suits us just fine-/ even tho as among the. Very few gringos around suits us just fine.
La Palapa . Hey it's the class of the beach. Bob's sizzling in pan chicken "So much better than I expected" fajita and my enchilada seafood. Brilliant. Amuse Bouche ( free) is that plantain w great sauces. R enjoying 2 martinis, b 2 chards- so. What else is new.
Sooo relaxing - on beach the troupe of musicians doing a photo shoot UNO dues tres they jump - gay couple - only others inside under palapa with us but drinking more cocktails - they win. We agree to the lapping waves- agreement this is a great vacation.
Siesta!
How lovely sitting on our balcony listening to the ebb and flow of waves and looking out at the sublime sea. Almost sublimity.
Bob says that it's raining, Even better. He exits to prepare dessert. Were paradise enow.
6/21 Tuesday
Rainy morning - a first for our time in PV. But stops in time for our morning stroll whilst Lola cleans our condo. We choose to return to La Palapa - virtually downstairs (across from
Frankly enough to eat - but, big eyes, there's more. Bob - flank steak beautifully spiced. Me - sizling mixed (chicken, beef, shrimp) fajittas - yay. (90 ish bucks) Reminder, next time just share appetizer + drinks.
"cheaper than Walmart" the tatoo vendor cries tho we didn't know you could get tatooed there. At our front row spot at Ritmos ("green chairs") beach entered a bit before 4 pm. I,ve just purchased light blue trunks on. The perfectly fitting (as much as anything could be for a 70 year old who loves his food and drink) yellow trunks, without lining, showed "my religion" alas - so only 4 suits in all purchased - probably for $75 total (yay) and my religion remains my secret. Purchase rainbow eyeglass holders from beach vendor.
Home. Rope. Balcony. Rachel Maddow. La Palappa left overs.
6/22 Wednesday
Awaken to lightning and rain. Perfect opportunity to return to bed, Frank Sinatra and dreaming. Awaken almost 9 - what luxury - and no rain - glimpses of sun even. We walk to the north end- tour a Mexican art gallery - specializing in pottery - pricey - the shopkeepers narrative is free. On our much-revisited river walk of vendors, we purchase for Don a Tiny framed photo of a Spanish looking stair - possibly a better choice than the iconic seahorse or one of the watercolors of palm trees, sunsets and cats - the lady artist/stallkeeer apparently loves cats - one sleeps by her side as she paints. We don't think Don shares her affinity for them, however. And then we discover the Mexican equivalent of Bloomindales - preceded by some teenage gay boys sauntering in - so you know it's authentic - pricetags Bloomingdalian, dance 10, atmosphere 3. But almost across the street - the icon - Woolworth! - not, or perhaps, to be confused with Woolworth's -- an all-purpose dept. Store with reasonable prices. Think Mexican Target.
The drizzle looks like it has more serious ambitions - so we duck into Daquiri Dicks- the weather having made our lunch choice . Our former "roly poly" waiter greets us as old friends - he seats us knowingly at our table bordering the terrace and looking out, of course, at the wet beach and wetter water canopied by a gray sky. We opine that biz is so bad - one other table is seated - that we are memorable and favored customers. Habits die hard. The 2 RKO martinis, the 2 RAG chardonnays and again R has that most acceptable club sandwich. Bob tries the pulled pork (who is being pulled?) "very Mexican comfort food although all Mexican food seems to be comforting."
It's raining after nap-time so Bob suggests I swim at the beach fronting El Dprado (God knows Bob has no intention of challenging the rain at
Of course raining on our parade is an email from Judy asking for money to save her car. $840. Bob generously recommends that we do it. But let her know No Mas. She replies that she has tears in her eyes. So do I Judy. So do I.
Later Bob notes aloud (it'sGarbo's) business is slow. German replies "You never know.' in unison we reply Do we ever. His boys, one doing his English lessons, the other I's sewing - not exactly piano bar sophistication - constTant patron John is leaving as we come in and we're IT. German suggests Archies Walk for dinner- we're queasy about La Bohemio's outdoor cafe which had been the dinner plan. But shortly friends and expats arrive - an animated group -and the friendly dynamic has us staying on for another round, a see you next year, and a comfortable leftovers -and -wine final evening at home.
6/23 Thursday Bye bye PV
Clear skies. Beautiful morning. Bob informs me that he broke a glass pane of coffee table which entails devising an apologetic email to Gary Gist, the owner ("We'll return, if you'll have us, that is.") I take my first morning swim in PV - delightful - while
Bob packs (typical and fair distribution of tasks).
The taxi driver overcharges us but what the hell he gets us to the airport - oh the joy of traveling - the wait in the Volaris line while the attendants painfully unpack everybody's luggage in turn - but we are able to purchase aisle seats in the emergency row (240pesos) despite not being able to pre-board on the web (what's with that?) but note to self - arrive early at airport next time.
The inevitable serio-comic ending. Mex Immigration asks about our tourist cards - which we didn't pay for - scared we produce them only after - careful puzzled inspection - official briskly declares "you have 6 months". Note to self- pay for the things next time. Then we wait ffor our Brit driver at appointed place. Not there. Bob searches the. Airport. No sign. I discover messages which say meet me in front. We rush to front. And finally a scraggly. Guy on the "5. Star" van arrives - mumbling nt told about meeting place , circled many times, out of pocket, etc. Takes almost 2 hours - mostly waiting at border as beggars, vendors bustle by - but we at last, relieved, arrive at our familiar place - the art, the possessions we know, the refrigerator with sufficient provisions, the bed we've slept in before
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